I started writing here in March of last year. I didn’t really have much of a plan or a goal other than to show up and write. For me, there were a lot of obstacles to making this happen.
- FEAR–What if no one likes my writing?
- Not sure what I want to write about
- Not sure what is mine to share
- FEAR–What are the potential consequences of sharing my family life on the internet?
- Not sure what my strengths are when it comes to writing
- I am a bit technologically challenged and don’t really know anything about how to blog
- FEAR–What if all the things I think are really cool and smart are actually things everyone else already knows?
I would have liked to start my blogging journey with a lot of confidence, knowledge, and a well thought out plan, but I could have been stuck there for the rest of my life. I just decided to start and figure it out along the way.
Writing gives me a window into my own thoughts, into how my thinking has evolved over the years. I remember writing poetry and short stories as I was growing up. I still have some of that writing today. I like to reread it sometimes. It is both fun and difficult to have a permanent record of who I was at a particular time in my history. I feel an affection for the girl I used to be and also cringe occasionally, thinking, “Oh, honey, you just didn’t have a clue back then!” This written record of my development challenges me to let go of the idea that I ever did or ever will have anything all figured out. It allows me to see that everything is a process and gives me some assurance that progress is happening.
Over the course of this year, I became aware that I actually have a feeling that comes up inside me when I need to write something down. And I know now that I had better stop and write or those ideas will either pass me by or else pile up inside me until I feel like they have just got to GET OUT. This year I have rediscovered that I am a writer. I am a writer because I WRITE. Not because anyone reads what I write, or likes what I write, or thinks my ideas are cool and smart. I am a writer just because I show up and write.